In the last year Id wake up with a sense of dejavu and a heavy feeling in my chest as if I couldn't breath. At work I would feel isolated and incompetent. It's like the harder I try the worse I become. With every decision Ive been making it seems theres always a door to a more miserable place. On bad days Id tell myself "Look on the bright side, tomorrows a better day". Even on those good days its the same cycle. Unworthy, incompetent and worthless is what goes through my head. It's a difficult feeling. The anxiety attack that time is running out and I should have accomplished so much more at this point.
Many artists I have met have experienced similar experiences. I love my life, my friends and family, my home and relationship. Im even coming to terms with having Celiac disease and being extra annoying when eating out. I think the best way to deal with a depression is to draw. Create what you can with how your feeling. Self portraits have always been my go to for this type of thing. For once I don't think I need to explain it ether. I leave this painting up for your own interpretation.